Episode Guide Teaser Act 1 Act 2 Act 3 Act 4


ACT TWO

 

FADE IN:

 

EXT. INN PATIO - EVENING

 

The diners have changed, but the ambience remains the same.  Soft strains of harp music float sweetly on the air to mingle with the sounds of muted conversation and cutlery striking against fragile bone china. 

 

Xena and Gabrielle, freshly washed and looking much more relaxed, sit at a table in a quiet corner, beneath a flickering sconce that washes their faces with dancing light.  An immaculately dressed man approaches their table and lays out their food and drink with professional aplomb. 

 

His tasks complete, the waiter smiles, gives a small bow, and leaves them to their peace.

 

Gabrielle immediately digs in, then rolls her eyes back in pure pleasure.

 

GABRIELLE

(groaning)

Oh, Xena, this is

the Elysian Fields.

 

Xena tastes a bit of what’s on her plate.

 

XENA

It’s all right.

 

 

Gabrielle looks at her.

 

Xena smirks.

 

They settle into companionable silence and enjoy the feast laid out before them.

 

DISSOLVE TO:

 

EXT. INN PATIO - LATE EVENING

 

Chewing the last morsel of an awe-inspiring dessert, Gabrielle pushes herself slightly away from the table and leans back, contentedly patting her straining belly.  Xena looks over at her, quirking a smile.

 

XENA

You ok?

 

 

GABRIELLE

If I were anymore all right, you’d

be picking me up off the ground

with a spoon.  Xena, this has got

to be the best meal I’ve ever eaten.

And I’ve eaten a lot of meals!

 

 

XENA

(dryly)

Ya don’t say.

 

GABRIELLE

(grinning)

I definitely do say.

 

Gabrielle allows her eyes to slip closed.  Sleepy, sated, and content, she finds herself drifting on the currents of the music and soft conversation that surrounds her.  In an often frenetic life, she welcomes the peaceful interludes when they come.

 

Xena gazes at her from across the table, a gentle, loving smile on her face. 

 

After a moment, a movement catches the corner of her eye, and she turns in its direction to see Andros standing on the western edge of the Inn’s elaborate portico, looking at the rising moon, his face haggard and seemingly ten years older than it was when she first saw him.

 

Her face thoughtful, Xena pushes herself up from the table and rounds it, coming to stand beside Gabrielle.  Gabrielle’s eyes open.  She smiles.

 

GABRIELLE

Hi.

 

XENA

Hi yourself.  I’m gonna go

check up on something. 

Be right back.

 

Gabrielle’s eyes follow the tilt of Xena’s head to where Andros stands, still staring into the sky.  She makes as if to rise.

 

GABRIELLE

I’ll....

 

XENA

No. I can talk to him.  You just

stay here and relax.  Ok?

 

Xena squeezes Gabrielle’s shoulder.  Gabrielle covers Xena’s hand with her own and smiles.  Captivated by the smile, Xena leans over and presses a soft kiss to her cheek.

 

GABRIELLE

Ok.

 

XENA

Be right back.

 

CUT TO:

 

EXT. PORTICO - NIGHT

 

Andros stands in a shadowed corner, watching the moon as it rises over the low hills.  He suddenly feels a presence beside him and nearly jumps out of his sandals as he turns to come face to face with the Warrior Princess herself.

 

ANDROS

Oh...!

You startled me.

(beat)

Is everything all right?  Something

not to your satisfaction?

 

XENA

No complaints.

 

ANDROS

Oh.  Well, good.  I’m glad to

hear that.  Is…there anything

I can help you with?

 

XENA

You might want to start

with telling me what it

is you’re trying to hide.

 

 

Andros’ eyes widen.

 

ANDROS
Hide?  Xena, I assure you,

I’m not hiding anything.

 

Xena slowly crosses her arms.  One eyebrow goes up.

 

ANDROS

(cont’d)

I swear it to you.

 

He hesitates at Xena’s continuing stare.

 

ANDROS

(cont’d)

P-private thoughts only, as

we all do.  Please, I only wish

for you to enjoy your stay here.

 

XENA

Well see, that’s where I have

the problem, Andros.  You’re

hiding something, and that’s

making my gut twitch.  And

when my gut twitches, I can’t

relax.  And if I can’t relax ....

 

A charged silence falls between them until finally, Andros’ shoulders sag.

 

ANDROS

You know of Ikos.

 

XENA

It’s an island near Crete.

A haven for warlords,

pirates and other scum.

 

ANDROS

My family is there.

 

XENA

Mm.

 

ANDROS

My wife and our two young

daughters.  They were

captured by pirates and

taken there against their will.

 

XENA

What happened?

 

Suddenly drained of his energy, Andros leans against one of the Corinthian pillars with his head touching the cold, unforgiving marble.

 

ANDROS

Two months ago, we began having

trouble with pirates in this town.

Especially the one who calls himself

Igor the Black.  Normally, even the

worst pirates confine themselves

to the outskirts, but these were

moving inland, threatening citizens

and causing a lot of problems.

(beat)

We have a militia here, and they’re

very good at what they do, but

even they were overwhelmed.

 

XENA

Go on.

 

 

ANDROS

It was then that my wife received a

message that her mother had taken

ill and wasn’t expected to live.  I

thought it best to send her and

our daughters to see her.  I

thought it would keep them safe.

 

XENA

And it didn’t.

 

ANDROS

No.  I had sent five of my most trusted

men to serve as their protectors. Only

one returned. Near death.  He’d

been beaten, and stabbed, and

ordered to deliver this message to me.

 

Reaching into the folds of his shirt, Andros pulls out a dirty, bloody, and much-handled scroll, which he hands over to Xena.

 

Unfurling the scroll, Xena reads the poorly worded message contained within.  Her eyes widen slightly at the amount of ransom demanded.  After a moment, she looks up, meeting Andros’ steady gaze.

 

XENA

You can’t afford what

they’re asking?

 

ANDROS

(very seriously)

Xena, my family is the most dear

thing in all the world to me.  I would

pay those pirate scum their blood

money if it meant I had to sell

everything I owned and steal the

rest.  There’s nothing I wouldn’t do

to ensure their return.  Nothing.

 

XENA

Then where’s the problem?

 

ANDROS

Delivering it. There isn’t a ship’s

captain worth his salt who would

go anywhere near that island, no

matter how much money I offered.

And the ones who would go, well, I’d

never see the money or my family again.

 

XENA

I see your point.

 

ANDROS

I’ve been given three days to

deliver the ransom.  I bought a

small pleasure craft that I plan to

sail to Ikos myself. At least I’ll be

close to them, even if my plan doesn’t

work.  It’s all I can think of to do.

 

XENA

(thoughtfully)

Maybe not.

 

Andros looks at her, confused.

 

ANDROS

Have I missed something?

 

Xena smiles just slightly, more a quick twitch of her lips than anything else.

 

XENA

Not really. Gabrielle and I

might be able to help you.

 

 

ANDROS

What?  No, Xena.  No.

I could never ask....

 

XENA

You’re not asking.

I’m offering.

 

ANDROS

No. No. Thank you.

But no.  I couldn’t possibly....

 

XENA

As I said, I’m offering.

 

She smiles. It is the smile of a predator; immaculate white teeth and flashing eyes.  Seeing it, Andros is hard-pressed to keep a shiver from going down his spine. 

 

XENA

(cont’d)

Let me talk to Gabrielle. 

We’ll let you know

more in the morning.

 

ANDROS

But....

 

XENA

Goodnight, Andros.

 

And with that, she is gone, leaving him to stare after her in a mass of confusion and for the first time hopeful.

 

CUT TO:

 

EXT. PATIO - NIGHT

 

Gabrielle watches as Xena approaches, knowing from the set lines of her face that something interesting has just transpired.  She gives Xena a smile as Xena approaches the table to stand beside her.

 

GABRIELLE

That took longer than I thought.

 

 

XENA

(distractedly)

Are you ready to go up?

 

GABRIELLE

Are you gonna tell me

what you guys talked about?

 

XENA

Yup.

 

GABRIELLE

Then I’m ready.

 

XENA

Let’s go, then.

 

CUT TO:

 

INT. BEDROOM - NIGHT

 

Clad in a silken robe supplied by the Inn, Gabrielle sits on the comfortable bed. The down comforter is pooled in her lap as she watches Xena ritualistically divest herself of her weapons and armor.

 

When she is down to her leathers, Gabrielle pats the bed and Xena readily accepts the invitation. She climbs into the gigantic bed and slides over, settling down next to Gabrielle.  Their bodies touch companionably along their lengths from shoulder to hip to ankle.

 

GABRIELLE

So.  Tell me. What were

you guys in such deep

conversation about?

 

 

Smiling slightly, Xena leans her head back against the wall.

 

XENA

Andros’ family was kidnapped

by a band of pirates.

 

Shocked, Gabrielle sits up, turning to look directly at Xena.

 

GABRIELLE

Xena, that’s horrible!

Are… are they still alive?

 

XENA

I don’t know. They’re being

held on Ikos.  There’s

been a ransom demand.

 

GABRIELLE

Dear gods.  That’s a horrible place!

My father used to threaten to ship

Lila and me there when we were bad.

 

Now it’s Xena’s turn to look shocked.

 

XENA

Nice father.

 

GABRIELLE

Yeah, well....

 

 

She shrugs.

 

GABRIELLE

(cont’d)

Can’t he afford the ransom?

He certainly seems rich enough.

 

XENA

He can afford it.

That’s not the problem.

 

GABRIELLE

Than what is?

 

XENA

There’s nobody around who’s

willing to deliver it.  Not who

can be trusted, anyway.

He’s planning on going

on his own tomorrow.

 

GABRIELLE

Xena, we can’t let him do that!

He’s a merchant, not a warrior!

They’ll kill him and take the ransom

and his family will die anyway!

 

XENA

I know.

 

GABRIELLE

Well, I assume you told

him we’d help him out.

 

XENA
I did.

 

Gabrielle grins.

 

GABRIELLE

And the plan?

 

XENA

(smirking)

What makes you think

I’m gonna tell you?

 

 

Rolling her eyes, Gabrielle pokes Xena’s chest with the tip of one strong finger.

 

GABRIELLE

You just better tell me.

 

XENA

Or?

 

GABRIELLE

Xena....

 

Holding up her hands, Xena gives in rather easily.

 

XENA

There’s a cove to the north of here.

Pirate ships often set in to offload their

loot.  There’s a system of caves back

there where they can stash their

stuff until the coast is clear.

 

GABRIELLE

And you know this because...?

 

An eyebrow wings upward.

 

XENA

I was a pirate once, remember?

 

 

GABRIELLE

(drolly)

Oh, yes.  How could I have

forgotten?  And the plan?

 

XENA

(casually)

Well, I figure we head up there

tomorrow morning, scout the

area, and when the time is

right, hijack us a pirate ship and

its crew and set sail for Ikos.

 

Gabrielle looks at her as if she’s taken one two many sword blows to the head.

 

GABRIELLE

We’re going to hijack...

a pirate ship.

 

XENA

Mm. Hm.

 

GABRIELLE

Pirates. Like hooks for arms, pegs

for legs, black patches where

their eyes used to be pirates?

 

XENA

Yup.

 

GABRIELLE

Knives between the teeth,

swords out the wazoo, walk

the plank kind of pirates?

 

XENA

Mm. Hm.

 

GABRIELLE

You and me.  Against an

entire shipload of pirates.

 

 

XENA

Yup.

 

Gabrielle breaks out in a wide grin.

 

GABRIELLE

Good plan!

 

Xena can’t help but let out the laugh she’s been holding in, and gathers Gabrielle into her arms as she does so.

 

XENA

Have I mentioned lately

how much I love you?

 

Gabrielle pretends to think for a moment.

 

GABRIELLE

I dunno.  You might have

to refresh my memory.

 

Turning Gabrielle’s head just slightly, Xena lowers her own until their lips meet in a kiss that rapidly deepens into heady passion.  When at last they break away, both are breathing heavily.

 

GABRIELLE

(cont’d)

Whoo!  That much, huh?

 

Xena grins.

 

XENA

Oh no.  Much more.

 

 

They grin at one another like sappy fools for a long moment.  Then....

 

GABRIELLE

Xena?

 

XENA

Yes?

 

GABRIELLE

If this is gonna be our last

night on land for awhile....

 

XENA

Yes?

 

GABRIELLE

Let’s make it count.

 

Grinning even more broadly, Xena pulls Gabrielle against her.

 

XENA

(very softly)

Yo. Ho. Ho.

 

CUT TO:

 

INT. BEDROOM - MORNING

 

Gabrielle walks into the room, her arms piled high with clothing and stops, eyes wide in amazement and admiration.

 

There standing before her is Xena.  Dressed in a flowing white shirt that comes in tight against her forearms and torso, a bright red sash wrapped around her waist, and tight black leather pants, she is a vision to Gabrielle.  A fancy-hilted saber hangs from a belt at her waist, knives are tucked into the high tops of her shiny, black boots, and her hair flows wild and free over her shoulders.

 

 

GABRIELLE

Whoa.

 

Grinning, Xena spreads her hands.

 

XENA

You like?

 

 

GABRIELLE

I think you should keep

it after this is all over.

 

XENA

Think so, huh?

 

GABRIELLE

Oh yeah.

 

Chuckling softly, Xena walks to where Gabrielle is standing.

 

XENA

So, what do you have here?

 

GABRIELLE

Makings of my pirate

costume… I think.

 

XENA

Let’s see.

 

Plucking the silken fabrics from the stack in Gabrielle’s arms, she grins.

 

XENA

(cont’d)

Oh yeah, I think these

will work just fine.

 

CUT TO:

 

INT. BEDROOM - ONE CANDLEMARK LATER

 

Gabrielle stands open-mouthed in front of a mirror propped up in one corner of the massive room.  Her upper body is draped in several lengths of colorful silk that look as if they’re only being held up by a wing and a prayer to the gods.  They’re actually much more secure than that, and will allow her to fight without worry of overexposing herself, but the whole effect is somewhat… different to her eyes.  Her lower half is sensibly covered, and her weapons are near to hand, but still....

 

 

After several false starts, she finally manages to find her voice.

 

GABRIELLE

Xena?

 

XENA

Mm?

 

GABRIELLE

You’re a pirate, right?

 

XENA

(drawling)

Yes....

 

GABRIELLE

And I’m supposed to

be… what, exactly?

 

 

Coming up behind Gabrielle, Xena puts an arm around her waist and pulls her tightly against her.

 

XENA

You are the pirate’s

most valuable treasure.

 

GABRIELLE

You mean I’m booty.

 

Xena pulls back just enough to examine the silk-clad body part in question.

 

XENA

You might say that, yes.

 

GABRIELLE

This is payback for

Rome, isn’t it?

 

Xena contrives to look shocked.

 

XENA

Would I do that to you?

 

Gabrielle’s eyes answer that question better than her lips ever could.

 

Grinning, Xena hugs Gabrielle, then releases her.  Her face sobers.

 

XENA

(cont’d)

The truth is, the sea still gets

to you.  And if you should get

sick, your absence from my

side would be difficult to explain

if you were an experienced pirate.

 

Thinking on Xena’s words a moment, Gabrielle finally nods.

 

GABRIELLE

You’re right. Not that I’m thrilled

about it, but you’re right.

 

XENA

(seriously)

Well, is there some other way

you can think of to work this?

 

 

Gabrielle thinks again, then shakes her head.

 

GABRIELLE

No, you’re right. A seasick

pirate isn’t exactly the

look we’re going for.

 

XENA

Not really, no.

 

GABRIELLE

Well… do I at least get

to fight, if it’s needed?

 

Xena grins and gently pokes an area of exposed skin.

 

XENA

Do I look like the type who

enjoys having wimpy little

body slaves hanging around?

 

GABRIELLE

Hm. There might be some

perks to this job after all.

 

XENA

I figured you’d see

it my way eventually.

 

GABRIELLE

(warningly)

Just remember....

 

XENA

I know. I know.  Paybacks.

 

GABRIELLE

Heh.

 

CUT TO:

 

INT. INN RECEPTION AREA - MORNING

 

The reception area is empty save for the Concierge, who gives Xena and Gabrielle a polite smile as they enter.

 

Andros then enters through a side door, half carrying/half dragging a heavy golden chest behind him.  He gives them both a broad smile.

 

ANDROS

Xena!  Gabrielle!  You’re

both looking… um….

 

Gabrielle laughs.

 

GABRIELLE

That’s ok, Andros.  We’re pretty

much used to that reaction

no matter what we’re wearing.

 

Returning the laugh, Andros drops the chest with a grunt of relief.

 

XENA

We won’t be needing that.

 

ANDROS

Excuse me?

 

Xena points to the chest.

 

XENA

I assume that’s the ransom.

 

 

ANDROS

Yes, it is, but....

 

XENA

We won’t be needing it.

 

ANDROS

But how...?

 

Gabrielle approaches Andros and lays a hand on his wrist.  She smiles.

 

GABRIELLE

Andros, these men stole your

family.  Do you really think

they deserve a reward for that?

 

ANDROS

No, but....

 

GABRIELLE

Keep the money.  Give it to

someone who deserves it.

 

ANDROS

You deserve it.  For all

you’re doing for my family.

 

XENA

No.

 

ANDROS

But....

 

GABRIELLE

Andros, give it to someone who

needs it.  Surely there are poor

people in this town who could

use this money.  We’ve seen them

when we were walking through.

 

ANDROS

Well, I suppose I could....

 

GABRIELLE

Good.

 

 

Giving his wrist a final pat, she steps away. 

 

GABRIELLE

(cont’d)

We’ll see you soon, all right?

Spend the time getting ready to

give your family the best welcome

home this town has ever seen.

 

With a final grin, Gabrielle collects Xena, and they both leave the Inn. 

 

Andros just stands there.  Staring.

 

CUT TO:

 

EXT. COVE - LATE AFTERNOON

 

The quiet inlet directly abuts the sea.  High cliff walls tower above the surf, and deep caves dot those cliffs.  The area is inaccessible to all but the heartiest of seamen and one determined Warrior Princess.

 

Safely hidden behind a rocky outcropping, Xena and Gabrielle look on as a small group of pirates unload wooden chests of treasure from a boat they’ve rowed to shore.  A large PIRATE SHIP waits out at sea, bobbing in the violent surf that rams itself again and again against the towering cliffs, sending up milky curds of white foam.

 

The pirates carry the heavy treasure chests to a cave a short distance away from the rocky shore.

 

XENA

Looks like that’s

the last of it.

 

Gabrielle watches as the men, five in all, emerge from the cave and wipe the sand from their bodies.  The largest pirate is a heavy man dressed in colorful silks and sporting an eye patch.  He grabs something from his belt, then holds his fist out.  The others gather around nervously.

 

GABRIELLE

What are they doing?

 

XENA

Drawing lots.

 

GABRIELLE

For what?

 

XENA

(grimly)

You’ll see.

 

 

On cue, all the men open their hands.  One of them, a tall, skinny fellow, turns white behind his heavy beard.  He makes a desperate run for the waiting boat, only to be hauled back by his mates.  Eye patch draws his sword and with the others holding the unfortunate struggling pirate by the arms, plunges it into his unprotected belly.

 

GABRIELLE

(softly)

By the gods...  Why?

 

XENA

The pirates around here are a

superstitious lot.  They know that

any gang with a ship brave enough

to withstand the tide can come along

and steal their treasure.  So they kill

one of their own and leave his ghost

to guard the loot.  No one will come

as long as they see the body.

 

Looking a little green, Gabrielle turns away as the dead man is dragged back to the caves.

 

GABRIELLE

That’s… Gods.

 

Xena gently rubs Gabrielle’s back as the young woman takes in deep breaths of the misty salt air.  After a moment, Gabrielle turns back, her color somewhat restored.

 

GABRIELLE

(cont’d)

Now what?

 

 

XENA

They’ll go back out to the ship

with the tide.  And when they

do…we’ll be waitin’ for ‘em.

 

FADE OUT.
 

END OF ACT TWO

ACT THREE