ACT ONE

FADE IN:

EXT. FOREST CAMPSITE - NEAR SUNSET

Xena and Gabrielle sit near their fire, wrapped in the odd linen shifts they seem to use as towels, underwear, beachwear, and crucifixion gear.  The villagers are sitting around the fire, on the other side.

XENA

Look. I'm flattered.

(pausing)

But there's no way....

Gabrielle takes Xena's hand in hers, and distracts her by squeezing it.

GABRIELLE

Xena....

ESCOBAR

It is only for a day. Please, won't you

help us? This is a tradition of our

village, going back many, many years.

You would be only the latest of those

who have given this one day to our cause.

XENA

I said....

GABRIELLE

Xena.

She looks at the villagers.

GABRIELLE

(cont’d)

Would you excuse

us for a minute?

The villagers look at each other, then they get up and walk off into the thick forest, but not far enough to disappear. They watch the shadows nervously.

GABRIELLE

(cont’d)

Xena, listen.

Xena growls.

GABRIELLE

(cont’d)

Save it for someone who

doesn't wash your underwear.

She smiles impishly at Xena's startled and bemused expression.

GABRIELLE

(cont’d)

Look, remember what we were

talking about? Leadership?

Here's a chance to see which

one of us is right. You try your

way, I'll try my way.... It'll be fun.

XENA

FUN?

GABRIELLE

Did you have something else

planned for tomorrow?

C'mon. It's only one day.

Xena sighs.

XENA

This whole things a setup, isn't

it? How'd you manage it?

GABRIELLE

Setup? I haven't been out of

your sight for a month! Get real!

XENA

I had to sleep sometime.

Gabrielle just laughs and shakes her head. Xena throws her hands up in defeat.

XENA

(cont’d)

Okay, fine. One day.

How bad could it be?

Gabrielle motions the villagers over.

GABRIELLE

Guys, you got a queen.

The villagers look extremely pleased. They nod and smile and Escobar seems especially happy.

ESCOBAR

Excellent! Wonderful! Our village

is just over the ridge.  If you would

be so kind as to follow us, I will

bring you to the queen's residence.

Xena glances around at the campsite and shrugs, seemingly reconciled to the idea.

XENA

Gotta have a softer

bed than this place.

Xena and Gabrielle start packing up their gear, as the villagers eagerly 'help.' One man goes to pick up Xena's sword. Xena boots his hand out of the way, then boots the man gently away from her stuff.

XENA

(cont’d)

Don't touch anything.

You could get hurt.

Gabrielle twirls her sais and seats them into her boots. She is grinning.

ESCOBAR

Come, and I will have everything

made ready, and prepare

your gowns, and....

Xena looks over her shoulder and cocks and eyebrow at him.

XENA

What?

GABRIELLE

(chortling softly)

Oh, I'm gonna love

this. I just know it.

Xena tosses her bag to her, and they start off. Xena is shaking her head. She is beginning to suspect she's been had.

CUT TO:

EXT. TOWN SQUARE - EARLY EVENING

The town is a very good size one. There are cobble lined streets, and several of them are lined with well made houses. It is obvious this place is prosperous. The town square has a big hall on one side, a two story inn on a second, what appears to be a mercantile on the third, and on the fourth side is what in this place passes for a mansion. It has three stories, and is meticulously kept. The gates are polished, and the walk is lined with scrupulously trimmed hedging.

Townsfolk walk back and forth, most of them well dressed. They spot Escobar returning, and everyone stops to watch as the group troops into the square triumphantly with their prize. Xena and Gabrielle are in the center of them, and as Xena is spotted, a crowd starts to gather to point and stare.

Escobar goes to the center of the square, where there is a very large community well, and a bell set into a wooden structure over it. With a theatrical flourish, he picks up a wooden striker and tolls the bell three times.

XENA

(under her breath)

Wanna guess what that's for?

GABRIELLE

(clearing throat)

Hope it's the dinner bell.

Xena rests her arm on Gabrielle's shoulder and shakes her head. She appears amused.

XENA

Some things never change.

Escobar walks over and rejoins the group, then he leads them towards the large hall.

CUT TO:

INT. TOWN HALL - EARLY EVENING

Xena and Gabrielle look around as they enter the hall. As in much of the rest of the town, it appears well built and well kept. There are seats for many people, and on one end is a raised platform. On top of the platform has been constructed what appears to be a judge's bench.

ESCOBAR

Welcome.

(clearing throat)

I should explain our traditions

before we go further.

XENA

Great idea.

Xena takes a seat on one of the trestle tables and waves her hand at him to continue. Gabrielle wanders around the room examining the wall's painted decorations. She is also listening, however.

ESCOBAR

Well....

A man enters. He is dressed very richly, and has a gray beard and moustache. He crosses to where they are, and studies Xena briefly before making a slight bow in her direction.

ESCOBAR

(cont’d)

Malcos, I was just going to

explain to our royal guest....

MALCOS

So I see.

Malcos flicks hand at Escobar.

MALCOS

(cont’d)

So you are the one he has found.

What is your name, child?

Xena's eyes nearly come out of her head. She gets up and walks over to him, leaning over him until he backs up several steps.

XENA

The name's Xena, grandpa.

MALCOS

Xena. That's a very interesting

name. Do you hale from these

parts? It seems familiar, somehow.

Escobar interjects his body between them, and steers Xena back towards the trestle tables.

ESCOBAR

Malcos, there will be time later

for you to speak with our guest.

Reluctantly, Malcos leaves. Gabrielle watches him go, then she turns and goes to sit next to Xena on the table.

ESCOBAR

(cont’d)

As I was saying....  It is our tradition

that once every year, all the crimes

and the troubles of our town are judged.

Gabrielle's jaw drops slightly. Xena appears surprised.

GABRIELLE

You mean... you have

no law otherwise?

ESCOBAR

Yes. We used to have soldiers and a

magistrate long ago, but they became

too expensive, and the soldiers would

often fight.  We decided on this way,

so that during the year there is peace,

and all know they must bring their

disagreements up to one place, at one time.

Xena and Gabrielle exchange glances.

GABRIELLE

Wow. There must be a

lot to do that one day.

ESCOBAR

Not really.

He turns to Xena.

ESCOBAR

(cont’d)

You will have perhaps a score of

cases to hear tomorrow. We are

a peace loving, prosperous place.

XENA

A score? You sure you're

not all just dead?

The men and women in white chuckle nervously.

ESCOBAR

It must seem strange to you, but it

is true. We use tradition and ceremony

to ensure harmony and justice.

Even Gabrielle appears dubious.

GABRIELLE

Sounds... perfect.  But.... I mean,

what if someone does something

like....  Well, if they kill someone.

Escobar frowns.

ESCOBAR

We are not that kind of people.

Xena rolls her eyes. Gabrielle scratches her jaw.

ESCOBAR

(cont’d)

But if that were to happen, day

after tomorrow, yes. That person

would wait to be judged until the

time of reckoning comes again.

(pausing)

So now that you understand

our ways, come. I will take

you to your place of honor.

Xena and Gabrielle look at each other, then they both shake their heads at the same time. Xena picks up her bag and slings it over her shoulder, and follows Escobar out. Gabrielle remains perched on the trestle table.

The remaining white clad women and men look back at her. They seem uncomfortable.

GABRIELLE

So.

She picks out one at random.

GABRIELLE

(cont’d)

What's your name?

The woman she is pointing at looks around, as though she has no idea who Gabrielle is speaking to, then she realizes it is her.

WOMAN

Oh. My name? It's Clarissae.

GABRIELLE

So.. what kind of problems are

we looking at here, tomorrow?

Street thieves? Stolen cows? What?

MAN

(under breath)

We?

CLARIESSAE

Not... Really. It's more like....

WOMAN

Jothan's youngest son

insulted the miller's daughter.

MAN

Yeah, and then there's

the innkeeper....

CLARIESSAE

Oh yeah....

WOMAN

The miller accused her of

charging too much for his bread.

GABRIELLE

Uh huh... What else?

The men and women gathered more closely around her, they are more animated now and less wary.

MAN

The mayor's dog bit

my mother. She's suing.

WOMAN

Don't forget the witch.

Gabrielle starts.

GABRIELLE

Witch?

CLARIESSAE

Malcos is convinced she cursed his

store. He's owns the big one across

from here. It's needed a new roof,

and the shelves all fell down....

Gabrielle holds her hands up.

GABRIELLE

Okay...  I get it. Thanks. One of

you want to take me wherever

it is they took Xena?

CLARIESSAE

Um... Well.... You can't.

GABRIELLE

Excuse me?

The men and women look at each other.

MAN

It's your friend who was chosen.

No one sees the judge before

the judging. It's the law.

Gabrielle hops off the table.

GABRIELLE

Hmm. That may be your law. Let

me let you in on me and Xena's law.

CLARIESSAE

But....

GABRIELLE

Where Xena goes, I go. You don't

get one of us and not the other.

We come like a pair of boots.

CLARIESSAE

But....

GABRIELLE

Pair of shoes? Team of horses?

Salt and pepper? A set of oars?

MAN

Uh... okay....

GABRIELLE

Two peas in a pod?

Two ruts in the road?

CLARIESSAE

(covering ears)

OKAY! Okay... we'll take you over

there. Just don't say I didn't warn

you. It's against our laws, and....

GABRIELLE

And we can judge ourselves

on that tomorrow, right?

The men and women look at each other in some confusion, but eventually troop out, leading Gabrielle out the door.

FADE OUT.

END OF ACT ONE

ACT TWO